Rendered

in Cinema4D. Character sculpted and Textured by me. Plants from Quixel.

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It's been 2 years since Qinni (Qing Han) passed away and I decided to do a tribute piece based on one of her art pieces. Qing Han's passing hit me very hard and I have a lot of continuing grief, and I have some things I would like to write. I wanted to make a tribute art for her 2 years ago, but I didn't feel like I could at the time for many reasons. She has so much wonderful art.Qinni was a big inspiration to me and helped me feel empowered to make art when I was very young. I encountered her art on deviantart, and her animation with the glowing fish is so iconic in my mind that it plays in my mind every so often throughout my whole life. I think early on I somewhat saw myself in her, and that made me feel like making nice art was achievable.

I want to share my experience of the day I found out Qinni had passed away, because I'll remember it forever. I had been worrying about her for months since she posted about her struggles with cancer. One day my friend texted me telling me the news. I was at work and i ended up leaving early for the day because I couldn't stop crying. I made a stop by my favorite coffee shop that I was a regular of to get some kind of sweet drink. The baristas were comfortable chatting with me because I went there so often. One barista asked me, "how's it going?" and I couldn't even pretend, "bad" I replied. He was concerned and asked me why. I told him what happened, and I unintentionally burst out into tears. He didn't have to do this, but he gave me a hug as I cried into his shoulder. He followed by telling me how sad he was when Aviici passed away, and he related to me. The barista told me that it's sad when artists are only appreciated when they are gone. "We should support the living legends." he told me. I wish I thought to support her more when she was here.

Going into the future I will always take this baristas thought with me and be sure to support the people who inspire me while they are here to receive my support. I do also hope Qinni is looking down and understanding the impact she made to a total stranger like me. (Just as the barista did as well. I don't even know his name...)

Qinnis Original drawing here: